In the Middle

There is a not-quite-silent war going on in our house, one that has me smack dab in the middle, and I'm totally tired of being there. Ernie and Sarah are nit-picking at each other on an ever-increasing basis and I get the details from both sides - one side at a time of course. Now, I can see both sides (at times), but of course neither wants to hear or understand the "other", just vent about their own. Ernie doesn't like that Sarah sleeps all day and stays up on the computer most of the night. He doesn't like that she is ill, in body, and perhaps in spirit as well, to the point that she no longer seeks work. She doesn't "do" anything about the house, to speak of. She is getting resentful of running errands for her dad and going out for fast food. On her part, Sarah is ticked that her dad sits all the time and demands that she wait on him, fetch for him, etc. Both of them need to be more active and "do" more. Sarah cooks several times a week. Ernie unloads and loads the dishwasher several times a week and makes the morning coffee. What else? I do it or it tends not to get done.
Now, I mostly don't resent what I do, but I am so tired of being in the middle of the feud between two individuals who both seem to be miserable and they take it out on each other. I would t least like peace, contentment, agreeability (is that a word?). Is this too much to ask?

I saw the spinal specialist last Friday, expecting to hear about osteoarthritis, bone thinning, exercize, hip deterioration, etc.... Instead, the doc pulls up the MR scan and starts showing me pictures of my lower spine, specifically a defect that is causing one vertibrae to slip over another and pinching off or impinging on, the nerve cluster. He pointed out weakness in my right ankle and big toe, areas of reduced sensation along the foot and leg and traced exactly where the pain travels across my back. Then, he tells me that he is referring me to a spine surgeon, that I have an actual structural defect that can be "fixed" and the pain should go away. I relate the horror stories of people who have had back surgery. He listens patiently, then assures me that I am not going in for a "slipped disc", but for a bone defect that can be remedies, the result will be a fix to the pain. Is this true? I know this does not address the arthritis in the hips or knees. Is a partial fix better than none? Now I honestly don't know. I see the surgeon next week and I'll go armed with a list of questions, but the final decision will fall on me. The last surgery "helped" the reflux by about 85%, enough that I'd do it again, but it did not totally eliminate the problem. Would I be happy with an 85% improvement in back pain? I don't know. At least the surgery doesn't have to be decided on within the next week. I can wait until after the holidays. Or hell, maybe I'll wait UNTIL the holidays, plan to be tied up then, no travel, no visitors, no decorating, no shopping. Aaah, now I'm thinking. Peace.

All Things Great and Small, hmm that oughta be...

The title of a book? This has been a lazy Saturday. I cleaned the bathroom and then set about to cut out a halloween costume for the office. I'm going to be a witch. Not sure about the wicked part. Halloween is always a fun time for me, or at least it was when the the kiddies were smaller. Last year we only had a dozen or less kids come by for candy. I had laid in tons because I expected a larger turnout. I guess the kids around here are a little old for trick or treating. From the sounds of cars racing in the wee hours of the morning they aren't too old for street racing though. I think grandson Daniel was the champ for getting costumes though. He always knew exactly what he wanted to be and we would go out shopping together for the pattern and material, then Daniel would dance around excitedly until I got it put together. Daniel has been a baseball player (blue striped fabric, including making a cap), a cowboy, an indian, two "super heros" and Zorro. Now he is a big 8th grader and way too cool for costumes, at least the kind that grandma would make. Angela has always been the recipient of hand-me-downs from her just-older cousin, whose parents always splurged on expensive store-bought costumes.

It is strange to think that our granddaughter, Jennifer is a Mrs. by now. The wedding was scheduled for early afternoon in Lethbridge, Alberta, Canada, or somewhere near there. Ernie and I had hoped to attend, but the cost of gas and airline tickets kept us homebound. When the first great grandchild arrives though, I'll be on my way, even if I have to thumb a ride.

It has turned to fall, nearly time to drive up towards the mountains and see all of the splendid fall colors. We did that last fall, and it was spectacular. Probably not like being in Vermont or some such place, but certainly prettier than the desert we inhabited for so long, and the Central Coast didn't really have a fall, so this is a treat. I pulled out the flannel sheets and put them on the bed this morning. I like my sleeping room cool to cold, but I like the bed cozy.